white lights of christmas tree decorating

Merry Christmas Internet. No? Not yet? Too soon? Well, Christmas is in full force in blog land from what I can tell. Gift guides are swirling around the world wide web and filling my Twitter and Pinterest feeds while cookies and ornaments are being DIY’d and published at an alarming pace. Do you ever fear you’ll “Christmas out” too early? Usually I peak around the time the ‘Rooms and I throw our annual party, but since he’s out of town on a gig this year and there is no party I might make it till the big day. I bought plates and a table cloth at Target just in case BECAUSE I JUST COULDN’T STOP MYSELF.  I have a real problem. Can’t stop this spirit. Ho ho ho.

To compensate I helped the hand-holding-man-friend put up his tree last weekend and I realized two things.

  1. This is my first Christmas with Instagram and I am unapologetically ‘gramming the whole thing. Check it.
  2. I don’t understand why 80-100 count strings of lights exist. ALWAYS buy the 250-350 count. Minimum. Buy two, three if you’re serious.

When helping the man-friend pick out his tree and fixin’s last year I must have been feeling extra nice, or maybe since it was our first Christmas together I didn’t want to “take over.” But somehow he wound up with only two strands of 80 count lights. And one of them FLASHES. He must have slipped that into the cart when I wasn’t looking or I was having an anxiety attack in Target and let him get whatever he wanted just so we could get out of there. But let’s be clear. That is not enough lights for ANY tree. Not  even the Charlie Brown Christmas tree. So yes, we bought more lights for him. Moving on.

Currently back at casa del Parkside Manor I am work-shopping the tree situation in defense of the terror of all ginger cats. A traditional tree is not going to happen this year and it breaks my heart because we have a whole extra room to fit the biggest tallest tree they sell in AstoriaI vacillate between making the best of things, and boycotting decorating altogether. In the end, I think I will put our artificial tree up in my bedroom where there are no gingers allowed, and you can catch a sneak peek of the current living room work in progress on Instagram. Believe it or not the cat has already showed interest in terrorizing plan B. We are not friends right now. Plan C/D is either one of those chalkboard trees, or the Kate Spade Kraft paper route. My drawing skillz are sub-par so I’m hoping the current version works out. If it survives the week I’ll take proper photos and  blog that shiz.

Wish us luck. Sophie is a DREAM around all things Christmas related and she’s super sad about losing her favorite warm place under all those lights this time around. What are you doing this year? Going traditional? Have any good anti-cat Christmas recommendations? Let’s chat in the comments.

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put maddie the coonhound on all your things!

You guys. There’s a new app in town and it’s called MaddieCam. I’m sorry if I lose you but this app made my whole Thanksgiving and it’s STILL giving me chuckles. Sometimes I think things are super funny and awesome, and then I put them on the Internet thinking other people will think they are funny and awesome and sometimes I am wrong. It’s ok if you don’t think this is awesome, I’ll still have Maddie to put on things. That cocktail picture up there? That was super funny to me at midnight the night before Thanksgiving when I was drinking a cocktail with liquor in it. The hand-holding-man-friend had lukewarm feelings about it, he’s a fun hater.

Anyway… Super Truncated Backstory: Maddie is a coonhound whose dog Dad’s name is Theron Humphrey and he’s a photographer who started a photojournalism project traveling across the country photographing a different person each day and along the way took pictures of Maddie standing on odd things. She can balance on pretty much anything and its amazing and awesome and unexpectedly touching. As a person who struggles with being too eager to please I guess I relate to Maddie’s heart and it resonates with me in a real way, but also it’s just pretty awesome.

The app is 99¢ and you should treat yourself and click that buy button. I’ve been following @thiswildidea on the ‘Grams forever and ever so in a way it felt like giving back for all the entertainment he and Maddie have given me? Is that weird? Wow, must be the time of year. Waxing poetical over an app. Anyway, if you’re a crazy stalker like me you can check out MaddieonThings.com for all Maddie all the time, and you can buy prints, and there will be a book, and these guys built the app, and this is Theron’s website. Have a great Tuesday. Go put Maddie on things!

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In case you’re not ready for the holiday I’ve got you covered here. For the past month part of my new job has been curating a tasty tasty holiday recipe Pinterest board for one of our clients. I picked the best ones for you, because I love you the most. Now of course normally a person would start any food pyramid at the bottom. But feel free to start at the top with that cider cocktail from The Boys Club Blog, I know I will. Cheers.

10 new recipes to spice up your holiday spread

 

ONE  // Pumpkin Soup. Six ingredients, that Martha gets it right.

TWO // Butter Roasted Turkey. Aside from the turkey, butter is the main ingredient. So, enough said.

THREE // Jalapeño Cranberry Sauce. Spicy & tart. I think I will eat this year round.

FOUR // Sausage, Sage, Apple Stuffing. It’s desert, it’s breakfast, it’s delicious. Make  the night before.

FIVE // Broccoli and Gruyère Gratin. Have some vegetables with your cheese.

SIX // Roasted Vegetables. In case you’re tired of the usual mashed scene.

SEVEN // Pumpkin shaped rolls. Carbs in a seasonal shape? Sign me up.

EIGHT // Orange Caramel Pecan Tart. Caramel + Grand Marnier? I’ll have seven.

NINE // Pumpkin Cheesecake Shooters. I usually hate the word shooter, I’ll make an exception for dessert.

TEN //  Cider Bourbon Bomber. Make it by the pitcher. Or fill the bathtub. Your call.

**All above images are sourced as linked. Click, make, and enjoy!**

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laundry day pile of naked blankets and pillows

Here’s how you make your cats entire world. Do laundry, and decide to wash everything. Strip the duvet cover and pillows and leave the naked bedding in a huge pile on your naked mattress. Go away, do laundry for two hours and come back to find this sweet little Kodak fucking moment blissed out in a cat fort nap nook he thinks you made just for him. Proceed quietly to fetch your camera and conduct a full photo shoot of your subletter’s cat whom you normally hate, but love when he sleeps or cuddles. Delay making the bed and putting away the clean laundry so as not to disturb him because you are a huge sucker. Know that he will not show you the same respect the next morning when he’s begging for his 6 AM kibble snacks.

this is what bliss looks like

In case you needed a close up of what bliss looks like. Happy Monday. How was your weekend?

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